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banner image with text can you make a narcissist obsessed with you? and the answer to that as yes

How to Make a Narcissist Obsessed with You?

The idea of making a narcissist obsessed with you might seem tempting – a way to regain control or perhaps even seek revenge. But, it’s super important to know that going down this path could have some serious drawbacks. If you’re seeking to manipulate or take revenge against a narcissist, this article might not be the best guide for you. For those who’ve suffered due to narcissistic behavior, the emotional toll can be immense. While it’s natural to want to regain a sense of power and make them feel the pain they’ve inflicted, seeking revenge usually doesn’t lead to real healing. This article wants to help you understand narcissists and whether is it really possible to make them obsess over you by following the methods given below.  Do Narcissists become obsessed with you? Yes, a narcissist can become obsessed with you if they recognize that your ability to consistently meet their insatiable need for narcissistic supply. This supply could encompass admiration, attention, and validation, which are crucial for a narcissist’s self-esteem.  Once the narcissist realizes the potential for abundant supply within someone, their addiction to the person can intensify, and they may focus their attention on that individual, seeking to extract as much validation as possible.  This fixation continues until the narcissist’s interest wanes, often due to their ever-shifting desires and short attention span. Steps to make a narcissists obsessed with you You can make a narcissist obsessed with you by making yourself appear high-value, playing hot and cold, ignoring them sometimes, and being emotionally unavailable. Using a “hot and cold” method, where you sometimes give them a lot of attention and other times pull away, makes them want your approval even more.  The Following tactics can make their obsession with you stronger and makes them keep trying to get your approval, which they find kind of hard to get.   1. Give a Taste of Narcissistic Supply Narcissists are naturally attracted to people they think they can easily control and manipulate. To catch a narcissist’s interest, it can work well to act like you’re really impressed by their charm at first.  Let them believe that they’re truly charming you. Make them feel like they’re in charge by letting them make choices for you, like what you wear, eat, or how you talk.  Once you give a little bit of narcissistic supply– that’s like attention and admiration – they want more and more.  This makes them start getting really fixated on you over time. Their constant need for validation becomes a big reason why they keep trying to get your attention. 2. Make Them Dependent on You Make the narcissist really want to be close to you by making them depend on you. When you’re spending time with the narcissist in your life, do things you’re really good at (or things they really don’t want to do). Don’t make them dependent on you financially or any big leaps. Just keep it on basic level dependency that wouldn’t make you trouble. The narcissist will start enjoying this little dependency and check how far they could pull you off. Hence, they’ll demand more efforts from you and be obsessed with your efforts. 3. Keep Your Value High To keep a narcissist really interested, always remind them how great you are. Show off your important job, big group of friends, or a special skill that everyone wants. Exhibit yourself that you are admired by many. Keep yourself as a secret and Show them that there is a lot more to learn about you. When they always know how amazing you are, they’ll become really focused on wanting to keep you around. This strong desire comes from their need to be connected with someone they see as extraordinary. It makes them want to stay close to you. 4. Spend Quality time with Friends and Family Let them see that you’ve got your own life going on and it is awesome, so they’ll want to be a part of it. If they realize you’re spending time and effort on other relationships, they might start feeling jealous or wanting to look out for you.  Make sure you hang out with other people or do things you love, and tell them about it. This way, they’ll understand that you’re not only focused on the relationship, and it will make you seem like an interesting challenge to them. This way of doing things doesn’t just show that you’re not only thinking about the relationship, but it also makes you seem really interesting and like a challenge to control. It’s like you’re a person with lots of different sides that keep them wanting to pay attention to you all the time. And the narcissist will react if you can’t be controlled in a way that they get jealous and get more addicted over you.  5. Withdraw emotionally before the Abuse To make a narcissist really obsessed with you, start pulling back emotionally before any possible mistreatment starts.  When you distance yourself emotionally as soon as you notice them trying to control or treat you badly, you’re setting a limit that challenges their sense of control.  This doesn’t just mess up their expected power balance, but also makes them want to get back the attention and control they think they should have.  Making a Narcissist fear you is pretty easy. By showing that you’re emotionally strong before any bad treatment happens, you’re basically making them really want to get back that connection they’re scared of losing. This makes their obsession with you even stronger. 6. Tend to be more attractive Show yourself as extra appealing when you’re around people, especially of the opposite gender triggers their need to compete and brings out their hidden insecurities.  When they see that others are giving you attention, especially people they might consider as rivals, they’ll want to show they’re in charge of you even more.  This smart move can make them super focused on getting your approval, trying to show they’re valuable…

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10signs of narcissistic devaluation and discard

10 Signs of Narcissistic Devaluation

Are you tired of feeling like you’re never good enough? Do you feel trapped in a cycle of constant criticism and doubt? You’re not alone. Experiencing narcissistic devaluation can be a painful and exhausting experience. But here’s the truth: your suffering is not your fault. It’s time to break free from the toxic grip of narcissistic abuse and reclaim your sense of self-worth.  Let’s get into the reality of what are narcissistic devaluations and how to identify those to protect yourself.   What is a Narcissist Devaluation? Narcissistic devaluation happens when a narcissist begins to diminish or undermine someone they were once idealizing. At first, they may have made you feel special, loved, or deeply admired, often called the “idealization phase.” However, as time passes, they might start to criticize, belittle, or withdraw affection. This shift isn’t about you; it often reflects their deep insecurities and need to feel superior by controlling how others see themselves. The impact of devaluation is particularly harmful because it happens after the idealization phase, which can create confusion. Victims often question, “What did I do wrong?” or feel the need to regain the narcissist’s approval. This emotional rollercoaster can lead one (victim) to self-doubt, anxiety, and even a loss of personal identity.   Types of Narcissistic Devaluation Signs Recognizing Narcissistic devaluation is challenging because it’s subtle at first. Because, narcissists are skilled at making their actions seem reasonable. You might not see it as “devaluation” but as moments of tension or normal relationship struggles. But, Over time, the abusive patterns emerge, and you should keep an eye on those devaluations to safeguard yourself from the abusive cycle. These aren’t random but deliberate ways to keep control. So, Keep watching for the below signs or narcissist redflags. The following are the Devaluation red flags/signs of a narcissist,   1. Emotional and Verbal Abuse One of the clear indications of devaluation is when the narcissist starts to pick at you, insult you, and put you down. They may constantly make fun of you or belittle your accomplishments.  This emotional and verbal abuse is aimed at demoralizing you, making you feel unworthy, and ensuring that you never speak up when they violate your boundaries.  Recognizing this behaviour as a sign of devaluation is crucial for your self-esteem and mental health. 2. Gaslighting Gaslighting involves distorting your reality to make you question your perceptions. A narcissist might deny things they said or did, making you feel like you’re imagining things. They do things that can hurt you and might even accuse you of forgetting things they deliberately never told you, saying, “I told you about this; you just weren’t paying attention.” Over time, you may start doubting your memory or sanity, feeling as though you can’t trust your own mind. This tactic serves to confuse you, weaken your confidence, and make you more dependent on their version of events, where they always come out blameless. 3. Blaming You for Their Problems Another devaluation tactic is making you responsible for their failures or bad moods. If they’re unhappy or something goes wrong, they’ll twist the situation to make it seem like your fault. For example, they might say, “If you hadn’t distracted me, I wouldn’t have made that mistake.” This not only deflects accountability from them but also leaves you feeling guilty for things you didn’t do, further eroding your sense of self. In a healthy relationship, both partners take responsibility for their actions. However, narcissists rarely own up to their behaviour and blame or gaslight you for that. 4. Silent Treatment One common tactic narcissists use is the silent treatment. As the devaluation phase progresses, narcissists may withdraw emotionally and physically. They may suddenly stop speaking to you, ignoring your presence as if you don’t exist. They may become distant and show a lack of interest in spending time with you or engaging in activities together. This can leave you feeling invisible, confused, and desperate to “fix” whatever you think went wrong. The silence is not about resolving conflict—it’s about control. By withholding communication, they shift the power dynamic entirely in their favor. 5. Intense Criticism and Nitpicking During the devaluation stage, narcissists often engage in excessive criticism and nitpicking. They may find fault with everything you do or say, no matter how trivial.  This constant criticism is meant to diminish your confidence and self-esteem. It’s important to remember that their criticism is not a reflection of your worth or abilities. 6. Manipulative Behavior Narcissists are skilled manipulators. They may use various tactics to control and manipulate you during the devaluation phase. These manipulative behaviours can include gaslighting, guilt-tripping, love-bombing followed by withdrawal, and playing mind games.  Recognizing these manipulative tactics can empower you to break free from their toxic influence. 7. Sabotaging Your Happiness Narcissists often find ways to ruin your good moments. If you’re excited about an achievement or enjoying time with friends, they might create drama, criticize you, or bring up unrelated issues to shift attention back to themselves. According to them, you shouldn’t have your own life. Every moments in your life should be associated and controlled through narcissist. Hence, This can make you feel afraid of getting joy and stuck up forever with the narcissist as they are discouraging you from seeking joy outside of the relationship. By doing this, they ensure that your focus remains on them and their needs by drinking down the throat. 8. Triangulation and Jealousy Another subtle way narcissists devalue you is through triangulation. Narcissists become increasingly jealous of your skills, strengths, and experiences. So, they may start comparing you to others, creating a competitive rivalry within the relationship. They may bring a third person into conversations, praising them excessively or comparing you unfavorably. For example, they might say, “Why can’t you be more like [person]?” This creates feelings of jealousy and inadequacy while distracting you from their own shortcomings. Read more about Narcissistic Triangulation 9. Discarding and Hoovering The discard phase occurs when the narcissist decides to…

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list of reasons why narcissist ignores you

Why Narcissist Ignores You?

Narcissists commonly have this super messed up behavior of straight-up ignoring the victim. It’s like they can’t see beyond their own needs and desires, and they just don’t give a darn about the pain they cause others. The victims end up feeling like they don’t matter at all.  Breaking free from this messed-up situation is crucial for the victims, But without knowing the reason behind the behaviors of narcissists, you run in circles with them in the abusive relationship. Narcissists Ignore Your Pain The narcissist’s behaviour of ignoring you is a distressing display of their self-centred nature and lack of empathy. When confronted with the consequences of their actions, they effortlessly turn a blind eye to the suffering they have caused. Their need to maintain an inflated sense of self-worth overshadows any concern for the well-being of others, leaving them feeling dismissed, unheard, and insignificant. It’s like the narcissist thinks they’re untouchable and can do no wrong. They act like they’re immune to any responsibility or accountability. Apart from ignoring your pain, narcissists ignore you to cause pain too. Let’s see how and why below. Reasons Why Narcissists Ignore You Narcissists may ignore you for various reasons like, When You Confront them Lack of Narcissistic Supply from you When You Block Them In the Devaluation Phase with you To Manipulate You To Gaslight you When they fear you And for more reasons. But why? To control of course. To control the situation, To control you, to control your life, and whatnot? Let’s delve deeper into why narcissists are so fond of ignoring the victims. 1. To make you feel Guilty The narcissists tend to blow tiny mistakes way out of proportion, making them seem like the end of the world. So, even if you did something small, they’ll act like you caused a major disaster. When they get mad at you, they might give you the silent treatment. It’s like a punishment to make you feel super guilty for what you did. They want you to crawl back to them, begging for forgiveness like crazy. Read: Narcissists Ignores your Texts at the Right time 2. Make you go Behind Them Do you know how some narcissists just love to play games, especially in romantic relationships? They get a real kick out of it. It’s like they enjoy the excitement of knowing someone is into them, and they actually like being chased.  So, if you notice them suddenly ignoring you, especially during that initial intense phase where they shower you with affection (the love-bombing phase), it might mean they’re starting to feel a little too attached. They want to flip the script and have you chasing after them instead. 3. When they get another Narcissistic Supply Narcissists – they might start ignoring you if they’ve got their eyes on a new target, like another person who can give them that sense of entitlement they crave. You see, narcissistic supply is what they call anything that feeds their ego and makes them feel like they’re the absolute best. They’re kind of addicted to getting approval, attention, and admiration from others. It’s like they depend on it to feel good about themselves, just as much as they need food and water. 4. To Make you Jealous When it comes to narcissists, they might pull this trick by ignoring you by pretending they’re super busy when, in reality, they’re not that occupied at all. Why do they do this? Well, it’s all part of their little game to make themselves seem way more important and exciting than they actually are. They want you to feel jealous of their supposed super cool and happening life, even though it might just be smoke and mirrors. Also, they’ll be all secretive and mysterious about the people they hang out with. It’s like they don’t want you to know who’s in their life, and that’s just to mess with your head and make you feel uncertain. They want you to start acting all needy around them like you desperately want their attention. 5. To gain 24×7 Attention As babies cry to get attention from their moms, sometimes narcissists ignore you just because they crave attention. It’s like they want to see how you’ll react and keep you on your toes. When you confront them about it, they often come up with excuses like, “Oh, sorry, I’ve been busy!” But it doesn’t always make sense, and it can be super frustrating for you. The thing is, they like to stir the pot and play mind games with you. They might ignore your texts and calls but then suddenly like something you post on social media. It’s all a bit confusing, right? Well, that’s exactly what they want. They enjoy messing with your mind and seeing how you respond. Will they stop ignoring you in the future? The thing is, The more you tolerate and enable their behaviour, the more they’ll keep doing it. 6. To initiate a Fight Narcissists kind of thrive on conflicts. Conflict is like a playground for them; they find it interesting and sometimes even enjoyable. They enjoy pushing your buttons and watching you react. By ignoring you, they’re hoping to get under your skin and make you confront them about it. They feed off the conflict and chaos that follows, finding some kind of sick satisfaction in creating tension between you two. 7. To test your tolerance to the abuse When a narcissist ignores you, it’s like they’re putting you to the test to see how much you can handle their mistreatment. It’s as if they want to push your buttons and gauge your tolerance for their abusive behavior. They play this game of silent treatment, making you feel insignificant and unimportant, just to see if you’ll stick around and take their nonsense.  They’re basically using this tactic to see how much control they have over you and how far they can push you without you walking away. It’s like they get some twisted…

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image of man who is a narcissist reacting in anger for blocking them. It has texts related to it.

How Narcissists React When You Block Them?

Breaking up with a narcissist is hard enough, but hitting that “block” button can feel like a new level of liberation. However, don’t be surprised if your newfound freedom has some unwanted side effects. Narcissists may react in a poisonous and nasty manner when you block them, but how could they possibly harm you if you have blocked them? They certainly can, and which is why you should have a clear view of “How Narcissists React When You Block Them“.   Blocking a Narcissist Blocking a narcissist can be a daunting task that requires mental preparation. It is indeed a difficult decision, but it’s also an important step toward protecting your mental and emotional well-being.  You should be mentally prepared before blocking a narcissist by earning about narcissists and how they would react if you block them is vital while building a support system of people who validate and support your decision. Setting clear boundaries or no contact is also a part of practicing before blocking a narcissist. From anger and aggression to persistent attempts at contact, understanding how narcissists react when you block them is essential for maintaining your emotional well-being and safety.  What happens When you Ignore a Narcissist? Reactions of Narcissists when you block them Blocking a narcissist can lead to immediate backlash since it will block not just the communication but also the narcissistic supply to the narcissist. Hence, out of anger or narcissistic fear, they react in so many ways to have their way with you to either get back to the relationship or hurt you. Narcissists react to blocking similarly to when they can’t control you. Here’s how,    1. Stalk Blocking a narcissist might seem like the end of a tumultuous relationship, but for them, it’s just the beginning of a disturbing obsession. The moment you cut off their supply of attention and control, they’ll resort to stalking as their first move. Stalking becomes their twisted tool to reclaim their perceived ownership over you and manipulate your emotions. They will let you know that they are stalking you which indirectly projects that they are now a victim of your act. This will trigger your guilt and drawback to the abusive bond again by unblocking them. 2. Ghosting Narcissists be like If the first doesn’t work, then the second will do. Ghosting is a silent treatment that is a manipulative tactic aimed at asserting control and causing emotional distress. By disappearing without explanation, they inflict a sense of confusion and self-doubt, making you question if you were the one at fault. However, ghosting behavior is a reflection of their inability to handle rejection and a desperate attempt to maintain their superiority. 3. Send Flying Monkeys / Enablers If their steps to hoover you back fail, they send others named “Flying Monkeys” or “Narcissist Enablers“. These are individuals the narcissist enlists to do their bidding and attack you on their behalf. When they realize their control over you is slipping due to the block, they may deploy these flying monkeys to harass, guilt-trip, or pressure you into re-establishing contact. These individuals may include friends, family members, or even acquaintances misled by the narcissist’s twisted version of events. The flying monkeys might be innocent too, however, it is better to distance yourself from anyone attempting to coerce you into reconnecting with the narcissist. 4. Gets contact with your close ones Narcissists can’t control themselves from watching you and knowing about you. Moving on is not in their dictionary. Hence, they try to get in contact with your close friends and relatives. This gives them additional access too like garnering sympathy, spreading false narratives, or even creating a divide between you and your loved ones. Hence, Surround yourself with a support system that understands and respects your boundaries, allowing you to heal and regain control of your life.    5. Try reaching you somehow When the patience of the narcissist is over and the narcissist doesn’t get another victim in the meantime, they try reaching you somehow. When they realize their direct access to you has been severed, they resort to sneaky tactics to maintain contact.  They may try reaching out through unknown numbers, fake identities, or anonymous online profiles, hoping to catch you off guard. This covert approach is a desperate attempt to bypass your boundaries and regain control over you.   6. Apologize Typically, Narcissists don’t want to let you move on for various reasons. Hence, When there is no way to get back to you, they realize that an apology is what brings you back into control. However, these apologies are often disingenuous and lack genuine remorse. Their primary goal is not to take responsibility for their actions but to manipulate and regain their influence over you. These insincere apologies are part of their elaborate tactics to hoover you back into their web of manipulation. They might pull out their charm and pretend to be humble, making it tricky to see their real intentions. Spotting these fake apologies is crucial to safeguard yourself from more emotional harm.   7. Smear Campaigns Although the above points hurt us due to the malicious behavior of narcissists, there are activities of narcissists that are done in an act of revenge or anger. In the list, smear campaigns are one.  When they are unable to handle rejection, they may turn to ruin your reputation if they are unable to deal with rejection and loss of control to preserve face and retain their image of superiority.  They propagate false rumors, half-truths, and distortions about you in order to alter others’ perspectives and turn people against you through a smear campaign. This premeditated and cruel behavior is intended to socially isolate you, making you feel helpless and powerless. 8. Threaten you Blocking a narcissist can trigger dangerous and manipulative behavior, often leading to threatening actions aimed at regaining control. These threats can take various distressing forms, such as blackmailing, where they may attempt to use personal information or intimate…

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11 Dysfunctional Things in a Narcissistic Family

Picture a family where one or more member dominates and controls everyone else, using emotional abuse, manipulation, and gaslighting tactics to maintain power and control. This is the reality for many individuals raised in a dysfunctional narcissistic family. Just think about how a child grows under such circumstances.  Children of narcissistic parents may be subjected to emotional abuse, neglect, or even physical abuse. They may also be held to unrealistic standards or made to feel responsible for the emotional well-being of their parent. In this article, we will explore some of the key facts about narcissistic families.   Why Narcissistic Families are toxic? Narcissistic families tend to be toxic because they are built around the narcissist’s need for control, validation, and admiration. This results in a family dynamic dysfunctional and may engage in a variety of abusive or neglectful behaviors, while other family members may become enablers or codependents, perpetuating the toxic cycle.  This can lead to long-lasting emotional scars and a sense of isolation and powerlessness for those trapped in the narcissistic family system.   Before getting into the article, we want you to know this platform is created with the motive that you can vent out your emotions through the comment section of the articles you relate to. You can either comment and respond to the people you relate to and also register with Udante if you want to have a private and friendly conversation with us for free.   Dysfunctionalities in a Narcissistic Family Dysfunctionalities in a narcissistic family can include emotional abuse, manipulation, and a lack of healthy boundaries affecting the family members. The resulting family environment is often marked by a lack of trust, emotional instability, and a sense of isolation and powerlessness for those trapped in the system.  The dysfunction in narcissistic families can have a profound impact on the well-being of everyone involved, perpetuating cycles of trauma and abuse across generations. The followings are some of the common and too impacting dysfunctionalities in a narcissistic family.   Lack of emotional bonding Narcissistic families are characterized by a lack of emotional bonding, empathy, and genuine concern for one another. Members of these families often feel isolated and alone. Furthermore, narcissistic parents may treat their children as extensions of themselves rather than as individuals with their own thoughts, feelings, and desires. This leaves children feeling unseen, unheard, and unimportant, leading to issues with self-worth and self-esteem. Overall, a lack of emotional bonding in narcissistic families leads to long-term impacts on children’s mental health and well-being, and it affects their ability to form healthy relationships in the future.   Focus on maintaining the family image The primary focus in narcissistic families is on Maintaining the family image. It is important for narcissists to increase their own sense of self-worth, protect themselves from shame and criticism, and control how others perceive them and their families. Some of their actions on their families are Have a burning desire for admiration and validation from others. They may receive the admiration and validation they strive for by projecting a positive image of their family to the outside world Often the fear of being seen as flawed or imperfect triggers feelings of shame and insecurity. By presenting a perfect image of their family, they avoid feeling shame or embarrassment. By maintaining the family image, they have strong control over how others perceive them and their family, as well as ensure that family members behave in ways that reflect well on the family. Make members of the family present a facade of perfection to the outside world, even if things are far from perfect at home.                                                                                                 Children are seen as extensions of the parent Children in narcissistic families are usually understood as extensions of their parents. Narcissistic parents see their children as a means of validating their own self-worth and meeting their own needs for attention, admiration, or control. They expect their children to excel in areas that they value or their unfulfilled dreams and aspirations. This leads to a child choosing to believe that they are only valued for what they can do or achieve, rather than for who they are as individuals. They may feel pressured to meet their parents’ expectations, regardless of their own interests, needs, or desires. As a result, children in narcissistic families may struggle with developing a healthy sense of self and may experience feelings of shame, guilt, or unworthiness.   Children are objectified In narcissistic families, children are often objectified by their parents or other family members. Objectification is when a person is treated as an object or a thing, rather than as an individual with feelings, needs, and desires.  The child’s own desires, feelings, and needs may be ignored or dismissed. This incredibly damages a child’s emotional and psychological well-being. In some cases, narcissistic parents may sexualize or treat their children inappropriately. Making sexual comments or jokes, exposing their children to sexual content, or even engaging in sexual behavior with their children are all examples of this. For a child, this type of objectification can be extremely damaging and traumatic which can even lead to PTSD due to narcissists.   Emotional manipulation, gaslighting, and guilt Narcissistic family members may use emotional manipulation tactics such as guilt-tripping, shaming, or threatening to control and manipulate the emotions and behaviors of their family members, leaving the victims feeling powerless and confused. The narcissists may use gaslighting to actively distort or deny reality to make their family members doubt their own perceptions and experiences, which can lead to the victim feeling confused, anxious, and doubting their own sanity. Narcissistic individuals may use guilt to manipulate and control their family members, making them feel responsible for the narcissist’s emotions or actions, leading to constant feelings of burden and responsibility, even when the victim has done nothing wrong.   Punishment for expressing opinions, emotions, or desires It is not uncommon for family members to be punished or face negative consequences for expressing their opinions, emotions, or desires.  Using tactics such…

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How to Make a Narcissist Fear You?

Narcissists often seem very confident and fearless. But have you ever wondered: what if they can feel fear too? It’s an interesting idea – the person who usually makes others feel afraid might actually be afraid themselves. But do they really face their fears? Let’s find out how to make a narcissist fear! Narcissists may seem like they have it all together, but beneath their grandiose facade lies a dark secret: a deep-seated fear of inadequacy and vulnerability. So, how do you get the fear out of the abuser who frightened you for the time being? Can Narcissist Feel Fear? Yes, narcissists can feel fear, even if they don’t show it in the way most people do. Their abusive and controlling behavior often hides deep insecurities and fears that they try to mask with a strong or intimidating front. A narcissist can be frightened in the same way as anyone else. However, narcissists may experience fear differently from others due to their exaggerated sense of self-importance and desire for admiration. A study published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Review found that narcissists were more likely to experience fear in response to threats to their self-esteem or ego, such as criticism or rejection, rather than physical threats or danger.  The study also found that narcissists may be less likely to seek social support in response to fear, as they may view it as a sign of weakness or vulnerability. What do Narcissists Fear? Narcissists are inherently afraid of anything that might expose their vulnerabilities and imperfections. Any situation or interaction that threatens to dismantle this carefully crafted persona is met with fear like the following, Rejection Narcissists often fear being abandoned or rejected because their self-esteem depends on how others see them. If they feel someone is pulling away, it can trigger a sense of panic. Failure They might seem confident, but inside, they can be terrified of failure. Losing status, respect, or control over a situation can feel like a personal attack on their worth. Being Exposed Many narcissists create a “perfect” image of themselves. They fear that their flaws, weaknesses, or mistakes will be revealed, which could make them feel humiliated. Loss of Control Narcissists thrive on control. If they lose power over someone or something, it can leave them feeling vulnerable and scared. Criticism Even mild criticism can feel like a big threat to a narcissist. They fear being seen as “less than” or unworthy in the eyes of others.   How do Narcissists react to Fear? Before we talk about how to make a narcissist afraid, let’s first warn you about how they might react when they feel scared. When faced with fear—like rejection, failure, or criticism—narcissists often respond with defensive behaviors to protect their fragile self-esteem. Initially, they might react with denial, dismissing the threat or pretending it doesn’t bother them. If the fear deepens, they may escalate to anger, blaming others, or lashing out to regain control and dominance. This response helps them avoid confronting their vulnerability. In extreme cases, their reactions can become abusive or manipulative, such as gaslighting, emotional outbursts, or even aggressive intimidation. Their goal is to shift the focus away from their fear and onto others, ensuring their image of superiority remains intact. These responses, while harmful to others, are a way for narcissists to shield themselves from feeling powerless or exposed. Escape Narcissist’s Reaction to Fear How to make a Narcissist Fear You? Here are a few steps that can make a narcissist feel uncomfortable or fearful—not out of malice, but to help you maintain control and protect yourself. It is always better to make a narcissist back off from you! 1. Set Strong Boundaries A Step that always comes first when dealing with narcissists. They fear losing control over others. By setting and sticking to firm boundaries, you show them they can’t manipulate or dominate you. For example: “I won’t tolerate being spoken to disrespectfully. If it happens, I will leave the conversation.” Setting boundaries is not just for narcissists, it’s a life skill that everyone needs to know to give others only limited access to your life. To other people, setting boundaries is a form of understanding whereas, to narcissists, it’s not. Narcissists fear boundaries.    2. Don’t Argue After Saying “No” When you say “no” to a narcissist, they will often try to argue with you or wear you down into compliance. To avoid this, it’s important not to argue after saying “no” because that’s when they’ll start trying to convince you. This is because, narcissists always use your opinions against you in the form of gaslighting and if you don’t argue after saying “no,” narcissists may fear that they’re losing control over you. They may become frustrated and try to manipulate you into changing your mind.   3. Withdraw Attention Narcissists crave attention and validation. Ignoring their tantrums, silent treatments, or dramatic behaviors can make them feel powerless. Practice the “gray rock” technique: be emotionally neutral, giving them nothing to feed off.   4.  Don’t show empathy Does the narcissist expect empathy from you? Yes, narcissists use empathy as a tool to gain attention and validation from their victims. Especially covert narcissists tend to use their vulnerabilities (let’s say, The narcissist cries whenever you want to fight them for their mistake) to the victim and get instant control as well as validation. But if you stop showing the validation out of empathy, the narcissist might start getting the reality of their vulnerabilities and fear that their vulnerabilities won’t be validated by you.    5. Start Engaging with their Friends Narcissists tend to show off themselves as great socializers by having more friends. But once you start socializing with their friends, they would start panicking and feel insecure about this. This is because narcissists claim to have friends who are close but they’re not. Friends always know about the narc and remember how the narcissist treated them.  Hence, you socializing with them would reveal…

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How Narcissists React when they can’t Control You?

Are you tired of constantly feeling controlled and manipulated by a narcissistic individual in your life? It’s time to change things to right. Break their controlling cycle and discover how narcissists react when they can’t control you.  Narcissists are individuals who have an inflated sense of self-importance and an excessive need for admiration and attention. In order to attain those, they need a sense of control over others. So, narcissists exploit those in their lives by manipulating and showing no empathy for them to gain control over them.  In relationships, this can manifest as attempts to dominate and control their partners through tactics such as gaslighting, bullying, and coercion. It’s important to recognize these patterns of behavior and seek help in addressing them if you are in a relationship with a narcissistic individual. Before getting into the article, we want you to know this platform is a community for Narcissists survivors where you can vent out your emotions through the comment section of our articles you relate to. You can either comment and respond to the people you relate to and also register with Udante if you want to have a private and friendly conversation with us for free.  Why do Narcissists control others? Narcissists want to control others to maintain a sense of power and to regulate their own insecurities and self-esteem. By controlling their environment and the people in it, they can avoid feeling vulnerable and ensure that they always receive the admiration and attention they crave.  Additionally, control allows them to manipulate situations to their advantage and avoid being held accountable for their actions. By exerting control, narcissists can also feed their sense of superiority and assert their dominance over others. How do Narcissists feel when they control others? When a narcissist is able to control others, they often feel a sense of power, validation, and superiority. This reinforces their belief in their own grandiose sense of self-importance and further fuels their need for admiration and attention. It is worth noting, however, that this sense of satisfaction is typically short-lived and also wants more. So, the need for control often becomes a vicious cycle that is difficult to break. It is possible that the act of controlling others releases dopamine in the brains of narcissists. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that is associated with feelings of pleasure, reward, and motivation.  Controlling others can be a pleasurable and rewarding experience for narcissists as it reinforces their sense of power, superiority, and self-importance, leading to a release of dopamine in the brain and making the behavior more addicting. How do Narcissists react when they can’t control others? When a narcissist can’t control you, it brings out their inner insecurities. Narcissists when their self-esteem and pride get failed leading them to get anxious and feel defeated. Hence, they may react in any of the following ways Become Angry Birds When they can’t control someone, it is common for narcissists to react with frustration and anger when their attempts at control are challenged, as their sense of superiority is often tied to their ability to control others.  When their sense of superiority is threatened, they may lash out in anger, either through verbal or physical aggression, or passive-aggressive behavior. This reaction is often rooted in a need to reassert their dominance and regain control. Malignant and grandiose narcissists are more likely to react in this way. Gets Disappointed in the Core They may feel frustrated and inadequate when they can’t control a situation, leading to feelings of disappointment. This can be particularly challenging for them as their self-pride gets down and the feeling of grandiosity drops. Some narcissists may have a greater need to control others as a means of regulating their own emotions and insecurities. When they are unable to do so, they may experience greater levels of disappointment. Withdrawal from everything In some cases, they may withdraw from the situation and avoid any further interaction if they feel that their attempts at control have failed. This can involve physically withdrawing from the situation, such as leaving the room or ending a conversation, or it can involve emotional withdrawal, such as becoming distant or unresponsive. This can be a way for them to avoid facing their own limitations and inadequacies. On the other hand, they do withdraw in the form of ghosting. This helps narcissists to regain attention and control over you. By ghosting you, the narcissist can communicate their dissatisfaction and exert a passive form of control. Shameless gets shame If their attempts at control are publicly exposed or challenged, they may experience feelings of shame and embarrassment. Their sense of superiority is often tied to their ability to control others, and when this is challenged, they may feel a deep sense of humiliation.  Narcissists may try to hide their feelings of shame by rationalizing their behavior and shifting the blame onto others. Below reactions by narcissists is the cause of the excess shame, they feel when they can’t control you. Denial as if nothing happened Denial is a common defense mechanism used by narcissists, and it can be a barrier to growth and change. Narcissists deny that they have failed to control you and experiencing negative emotions. For example, imagine a narcissist is told by a friend that they were rude and dismissive during a conversation. Instead of admitting that they might have acted inappropriately, the narcissist may say something like, “I was just having a bad day, you’re overreacting.”  Projection to protect them They may project their own feelings and behavior like, accusing you of trying to control them or of having the same motivations that they themselves have. In such cases, the narcissist will point out you as the problem rather than admit their controlling attempts. The narcissists might say “It was you who trying to control me”. In another instance, if a narcissist is unable to convince someone to do what they want, and instead of accepting that they were not successful in exerting their control, they blame the…

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image of Two skeleton kissing each other saying "What happens when two narcissists date"

How do Two Narcissists Live in a Relationship?

A Narcissistic couple may look like having a joyous and romantic life together, but you may not know the dark truth that happens. Let’s look at what happens when two narcissists date and how two narcissists live in a relationship.    A narcissist is a person with a personality disorder characterized by excessive self-love and self-obsession. In relationships, narcissistic individuals may initially seem charming and attentive, but their true colors soon surface as they prioritize their own needs above their partner’s and have a lack of empathy for others. They may use love as a tool to manipulate and control their partner, leading to unhealthy and unequal dynamics in the relationship.   Before getting into the article, we want you to know this platform is a community for Narcissists survivors where you can vent out your emotions through the comment section of our articles you relate to. You can either comment and respond to the people you relate to and also register with Udante if you want to have a private and friendly conversation with us for free.    Can Two narcissist Fall in Love? Yes, it is possible for two narcissists to form a relationship. However, their relationship is likely to be tumultuous and marked by manipulation, control, and a constant struggle for power. As both partners prioritize themselves above the relationship, there may be a lack of intimacy, emotional depth, and mutual support. These factors can contribute to the relationship’s instability and ultimately lead to its demise.   How do narcissists fall in love with each other? Two narcissists may love each other because they see themselves reflected in each other and feel validated by the relationship. They may also find each other to be a source of supply, fulfilling their need for admiration and attention. Narcissists may be attracted to other narcissists because they see a reflection of themselves in the other person and feel validated by the relationship. They may also find each other to be a source of supply, fulfilling their need for admiration and attention. Additionally, both partners may enjoy the power dynamic in the relationship, with each trying to control the other. The relationship may become a competition for who is the superior one, with both partners seeking to assert their dominance.   Relationship Between Two Narcissists When two narcissists date and become a narcissistic couple, it can turn into a tumultuous and volatile experience for both parties and eventually collapse. When two narcissists fall in love, they may initially feel it to be a thrilling and intense experience.  They may idealize each other and see the relationship as a perfect match. However, as the relationship progresses, the power struggles between the two individuals become increasingly evident. Despite the harm it causes to both partners, they may struggle to leave the relationship too. So, this will increase the duration of this narcissistic relationship prolonging.    What happens when two narcissists date? When two narcissists fall in love, they may initially react in the following ways: Idealization: They may idealize each other and see the relationship as a perfect match, with both individuals sharing a grandiose sense of self-importance. Mutual Mirroring: They may engage in mutual mirroring, where they both reflect and amplify each other’s positive traits, leading to a heightened sense of validation and self-esteem. Intense Attraction: The combination of idealization and mutual mirroring may result in an intense attraction between the two narcissists. Power Struggles: As the relationship progresses, the power struggles between the two individuals may become increasingly evident. Each partner may try to assert their dominance and control over the other. Manipulation: In an effort to maintain control, they may engage in manipulation, trying to control their partner’s emotions and thoughts. Emotional Abuse: The toxic dynamics of their mutual Narcissistic Personality Disorder can result in emotional abuse, with each partner trying to undermine the other’s sense of self-worth. Difficulty Leaving: Due to their strong need for validation and control, they may struggle to leave the relationship, despite the harm it causes to both partners. We can classify this whole period of the Relationship between two narcissists into two different phases namely Sweet Phase and the Toxic Phase.    Sweet Phase of a Narcissistic Couple The initial phase of a relationship between two narcissists can be described as Sweet Phase and it is intense and exhilarating. Both individuals may feel a strong attraction to each other due to their mutual self-absorption and grandiose sense of self-importance.  Since they share mutual personality traits, they may feel like they are made for each other, however, this excitement is often short-lived. As the relationship progresses, the toxic dynamics of their mutual Narcissistic Personality Disorder can become increasingly evident, leading to the collapse of the relationship.   Toxic Phase of a Narcissistic Couple The toxic phase of a relationship between two narcissists is characterized by power struggles, manipulation, and emotional abuse. As the initial excitement of idealization and mirroring fades, the relationship becomes increasingly hostile, with each partner trying to assert their dominance and control over the other.  The relationship becomes an endless cycle of emotional abuse, with each partner trying to undermine the other’s sense of self-worth and control their behavior. Ultimately, this toxic dynamic can lead to the end of the relationship, causing significant emotional damage to both individuals. During this Toxic phase, there occurs more drama, aggression, fights, manipulations, and so on. We can witness a whole Narcissist vs Narcissist battle.   Read to know about Fights between different types of narcissists   Ending with a Note It’s important to note that individuals with narcissistic traits can experience significant personal growth and improvement with proper therapy and self-reflection. However, without effort to change, a relationship between two narcissists is likely to be unstable and may eventually end in disappointment and heartbreak.  Also, narcissists possess no will to change and are renowned for lacking self-growth. So, try to avoid getting included between a narcissistic couple as it can be exhausting and abusive as…

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What happens when two narcissists fight with each other

What happens when Two Narcissists Fight with each other?

Narcissist vs Narcissist, See what happens when two narcissists fight with each other. How do their opposing egos and manipulative behavior works?   When you see a narcissist vs narcissist fight going on, say a fight between your parents who are both narcissists, you must know the conflicts that can arise between individuals with narcissistic personality disorder and react accordingly.    What happens When two narcissists meet? When two individuals with narcissistic personality disorder meet, they may initially be attracted to each other due to their mutual feelings of grandiosity and sense of self-importance. However, over time, conflicts may arise as they both compete for power, control and attention. Ultimately, the relationship may become dysfunctional, as both individuals struggle to maintain their inflated sense of self and struggle to feel superior to the other.   Common things that occur between two narcissists: Lack of empathy: Both individuals may have difficulties understanding each other’s feelings and perspectives, leading to a lack of empathy in the relationship. Competition: The competition between two narcissists may escalate and lead to manipulation, belittling, and criticism. Difficulty in compromise: Narcissists often have difficulty compromising and may struggle to resolve conflicts. Inability to admit fault: Both individuals may struggle to admit fault or take responsibility for their actions, leading to persistent conflicts. High risk of ending: The relationship may eventually become toxic and may end abruptly or in a volatile manner. Also read, What happens when two narcissists fall in love?    Narcissist vs Narcissist The term “narcissism” is often used to describe individuals with excessive self-love and a strong sense of entitlement. However, there are different types of narcissistic personality disorder, each with its own unique characteristics and traits. When two different types of narcissists find themselves in conflict, it can lead to a big emotional tension between the two. Let’s see how conflicts may happen between the different types of narcissists.    Before getting into the article, we want you to know this platform is created with the motive that you can vent out your emotions through the comment section of the articles you relate to. You can either comment and respond to the people you relate to and also register with Udante if you want to have a private and friendly conversation with us for free.    1. Grandiose Narcissist vs Vulnerable Narcissist A grandiose narcissist is characterized by extreme confidence, arrogance, and a tendency to dominate others. A vulnerable narcissist, on the other hand, is more sensitive to criticism and has a deep-seated fear of rejection.  When these two types of narcissists find themselves in conflict, it can quickly escalate into a power struggle as each individual tries to assert their dominance. The grandiose narcissist may seek to prove their superiority by belittling the vulnerable narcissist, while the vulnerable narcissist may respond with anger and defensive behavior.  This type of conflict may also involve manipulative tactics, as each individual seeks to maintain control and prove their worth. However, the person with grandiose narcissism will more likely have the upper hand against vulnerable narcissists who are prone to look weak and fragile to gain control over others.   2. Covert Narcissist vs. Overt Narcissist A covert narcissist is characterized by a tendency to manipulate and control others through subtle and passive-aggressive tactics. On the other hand, overt narcissist is more obvious in their need for attention and admiration. When these two types of narcissists find themselves in conflict, the covert narcissist may use their subtle tactics to undermine the overt narcissist. In contrast, the overt narcissist may respond with explosive and aggressive behavior.    This type of conflict can be particularly toxic, as the covert narcissist’s passive-aggressive behavior can create a sense of confusion and instability, while the overt narcissist’s outbursts can escalate the situation and lead to further harm.   3. Covert Narcissist vs Vulnerable Narcissist When a covert narcissist and a vulnerable narcissist have a conflict, it can result in a hideous and covertly toxic. The covert narcissist, who tends to manipulate and control others through passive-aggressive tactics, may use subtle ways to undermine the vulnerable narcissist. The vulnerable narcissist’s fear of rejection and sensitivity to criticism can lead to an intense reaction to the covert narcissist’s undermining tactics. However, the covert narcissist’s manipulative behavior can cause the vulnerable narcissist to feel constantly unstable and unsure of what is happening, leading to further stress and anxiety. In this type of conflict, each individual may struggle to understand the other’s perspective and may engage in further manipulative behavior in an attempt to maintain control and prove their worth. This can result in a vicious cycle of tension and conflict that can cause significant harm to both individuals and potentially those around them.   4. Grandiose Narcissist vs Overt Narcissist When a grandiose narcissist and an overt narcissist fight, it can result in a battle for power through extreme arrogance, aggression, and a desire to dominate. The grandiose narcissist, who is characterized by their extreme confidence and a need to control and dominate others, may seek to prove their superiority over the overt narcissist, who is also known for their need for attention and admiration. This can lead to a volatile exchange, with each individual trying to assert their dominance and prove their worth. The overt narcissist, who is more upfront about their desire for admiration, may react to the grandiose narcissist’s attempts to impose dominance with aggressive and hostile behavior. In turn, the grandiose narcissist may reply with callous or condescending conduct, escalating the issue further. This type of conflict can be highly destructive, as both individuals may lack empathy and engage in manipulative and aggressive behavior in an attempt to maintain control. The result can be a toxic and unhealthy dynamic that can have serious consequences for all involved.   5. Malignant Narcissist vs Communal Narcissist When a fight rises between a malignant narcissist and a communal narcissist, it can become a never-ending drama, Ego, and abuse. The malignant narcissist, who…

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How do narcissists react when they know you know

How Narcissists Reacts When they know you know about them?

Narcissists are experts at hiding their true faces and unveiling that face to the public might be the worst nightmare they could possibly expect. But, when the narcissist knows you know about them, these 11 reactions listed in this article may burst out of them.    Narcissists are often secretive in nature, as they seek to maintain control over the perception of themselves and their actions. They keep their true selves hidden and only reveal certain aspects of themselves to others. Narcissists also have a tendency to hide their true feelings and intentions, in order to manipulate and control others. Why narcissists are secretive? People with narcissistic traits often tend to have affairs, relationships or financial dealings that they keep hidden from others. To avoid getting caught, narcissists keep things secret. They are most prone to lying and deceit, in order to maintain control over the situation and to prevent being exposed.  Narcissists want to present a certain image of themselves to the world, and they fear that if their true selves were exposed, they would lose power and control over others. In order to protect the image of perfection that is created by them, they lie and deceive everyone around them.   How do Narcissists react when they know you know?  Narcissists are known for their inflated sense of self-importance and their tendency to exploit others for their own gain. When a narcissist knows that you know about their behavior, they may react in a number of ways to avoid their self-esteem getting destroyed. Here are 11 potential reactions that a narcissist may have when they know that you know about their behavior:   1. Refusal and Denial Narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance, and they may not be able to accept the idea that they have done something wrong.  They may deny that their behavior is problematic, and try to convince you that you are mistaken or overreacting. This reaction is an attempt to avoid accountability and to maintain their image of perfection. For example, your narcissistic partner may simply deny any of your confronts telling you that you are overreacting when you bring up incidents of them yelling or throwing things.   2. Blame-shifting and Making Reasons Narcissists often try to avoid taking responsibility for their actions. It is easy for them to shift the blame for their behavior onto you, accusing you of causing their actions or of being too sensitive.  They may also blame external circumstances, such as work stress or financial problems, for their behavior. This reaction is an attempt to avoid accountability and maintain control over the situation. For example, If your partner cheats, they blame you for their actions, saying that you were not paying enough attention to them and that’s why they sought affection elsewhere.   3. Gaslighting  Narcissists may use manipulation tactics to control and exploit others. One such tactic is gaslighting, where they try to make you question your own perceptions and memories. If you were not strong in their confronts, you may fall right into the gaslights and believe their claims to be true. Denying any events that took place is an act to convince you that you imagined them, in an attempt to make you doubt yourself and your understanding of the situation. Making you Doubt yourself is one of the worst effects of gaslighting that victims always suffer. This reaction is an attempt to maintain control over the relationship and to make it harder for you to hold them accountable for their actions. For example, When you bring up instances of them demeaning or insulting you in front of others, a narcissist may tell you that you’re imagining things.   4. Withdrawal or Silent treatments Since narcissists are not ready to face you as you know about them now, they try to withdraw from the relationship, either physically or emotionally, in an attempt to avoid accountability for their behavior.  They may stop communicating with you or refuse to engage in discussions about the issue. This reaction is an attempt to avoid accountability and maintain control over the relationship. For example, Your partner may stop talking to you and refuse to engage in any conversations when you confront them about their behavior, in an attempt to avoid accountability.   5. Aggression Narcissists may become angry and aggressive when their behavior is called into question. Aggression is mostly found in narcissists who are malignant and other types of narcissists show comparatively low aggression. Lashing out at you in an attempt to intimidate or control you, using verbal abuse, threats, or even physical violence are the parts of aggression they express when they know you know about the narcissists.  This reaction is an attempt to assert dominance and maintain control over the relationship.  For example, A narcissist with whom you have any relationship will become angry and aggressive when you confront them about their lies and may raise their voice or use threatening language to try to intimidate you into dropping the subject. It will turn into verbal abuse, bringing out the past and any irrelevant scenarios to make your point invalid.    6. Projection When the narcissist came to know you know about them, he/she may accuse you of the exact behaviors that they are guilty of in order to divert attention away from their own acts. They may accuse you of being selfish, controlling, or manipulative in order to divert attention away from their own conduct. This reaction is an attempt to avoid accountability and retain control over the relationship. For example, if your partner cheats and you confront them, the narcissistic partner will try to accuse you of cheating with someone else out of the blue to divert or validate their behavior.   7. Triangulation Narcissistic Triangulation is an act of bringing a third person into a relationship to cause confusion, abuse, and control the victim. Narcissists may try to create division between you and others in your life, by spreading rumors or lies…

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